Hindsight’s a Bitch
Posted on March 24th, 2021 by Velina Tailor

Personal Log, Stardate 12103.17

The away mission to the ice planet with the Blorping Volcano was interesting enough… I’ve never seen an ice slurry before outside of a dessert, but there’s a first time for everything, I guess. I’m not a geologist, so the finer points of Lexi’s explanation were probably lost on me. While I couldn’t help feeling like I was on a class field trip, we did find some microbes to study, so there should be some new discoveries to log for Science. 

Ammora behaved himself, mostly, even if he was giving people strange looks. I wonder if his time in the brig did anything to improve his attitude. I’m not convinced that he won’t do the same thing again to another officer, but at least he won’t be undermining my staff any time soon. 

So, the facts: The patient had cranial fracture and head trauma, and needed cranial support to immobilize her. That, Ammora was correct about — basic emergency training will tell you that. She also needed a thrombolytic, to break up the blood clotting caused by the subdural hemorrhage, as well as a bit of microsurgery on Acacia’s part to remove the biggest and most dangerous blood clot. Additionally, vascular regeneration to repair the arterial damage, the cortical stimulator to stave off degeneration of the axons, and finally, the intracranial pressure needed to be relieved. There was no aneurysm, however, as Ammora tried to claim.

So in the end, they were both right.

But.

Hindsight’s a bitch. We’re supposed to be lifesavers, miracle workers, and when something doesn’t go right, it comes at a high cost. I’ve lost patients, wondered what went wrong, and analyzed how things could have gone differently. I learned from my mistakes and become a better doctor for it. And sometimes even when there was absolutely nothing I could do to change the outcome, I still beat myself up over it.

I could see the self doubt creeping into Acacia’s face afterwards, and I feel for her, because I’ve been there, especially when I served on the Sirona during the war. But I need her to have her confidence intact so she can be the best healer she can be, without some twat who has no medical degree, trying to tell her she’s wrong, in front of all of the other medical staff no less.

Even if Dr. Acacia’s judgement had been completely off, and Ammora had been 100% correct, it wasn’t for some rando tac officer to decide. Not even if he’s had a little bit of medical training. It’s the ones with a small amount of knowledge who are the most dangerous.

That is why Ammora needed to be banned from duty in sickbay. Because of his arrogance, Acacia was questioning her own judgement, and that could have cost other lives.